Probing the Stalker Configuration

There are many dangerous situations in the world, but they can be successfully avoided if someone is careful and plots their course through life with a touch of wisdom and good common sense. However, there is one kind of danger that will follow you home and turn into a menacing nightmare, and that is when a complete stranger for some unforeseen reason develops an obsession over being in an intimate relationship with you.

Even when you do everything right, a stalker can end up at your door step. He’s the guy that dogs your trail everywhere you go, watches your house, sends you mysterious gifts, calls you constantly regardless of how many times you change your phone number, and even manages to invade your home when you’re gone. It’s a very frightening and emotionally draining situation to be in, which is what many women have experienced. Only recently have there been laws enacted to deal with stalker situations. Before that, nothing could be done legally until someone got hurt or killed.

It’s not fair to put the blame of the increase of stalker victims on things like the internet and online dating sites. Stalking has been around long before computers came along. Men begin to stalk women for a variety of different reasons, which makes it difficult to identify warning signs. Most of the time, women that are stalking victims have no idea of who the stalker is.

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Those who become victims are chosen in certain ways, more at random. Sometimes it’s a certain look, or a resemblance to an imaginary “dream girl.” Stalkers may lock onto their victims at work, or even just by passing them on the street. It could be somebody that a woman actually went on a date with. Friendly women can attract a stalker through something as simple as a casual exchange of opinions at a checkout line in a supermarket or at a bank. This is what makes it so difficult for women to guard themselves from being snared as a victim. There’s just no way to identify the potential of someone who is driven by this kind of criminal conspiracy.

It is understandable that protecting yourself would be of foremost concern for anyone, which can be done in certain ways. First, it is important to be very careful about any strange men you might date. Someone who has been recommended by friends is always a better choice for dating, but that’s not always possible. Exercise an instinctive outlook for unusual details. While many men are clever at hiding their stalking inclinations, there are some that will give off inconspicuous warning signs. This includes such things as the fact that he turns up unexpectedly many times where you are, asks questions concerning the people in your life, mainly about guys, and gets upset or angry when you can’t go out with him. Of course, these may not always be stalker signals, but you probably wouldn’t want to get involved with someone like that in the first place.

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Once you start receiving strange gifts, persistent phone calls and even see a man watching your home from across the street, don’t attempt to handle it by yourself. Alert the police immediately and get them involved. There are many states that now have officers who specialize in stalking situations and they’ll advise you of what you need to do. A restraining order may not be worth much as far as keeping the stalker away from you, but it’s still good to have one on file. That way, you can call the police whenever he violates it.

The smartest thing that you can do is listening closely to the instructions that the police give you and follow them exactly to the letter. However, there may be times when all you can do is take on a new identity and disappear by moving away; unless you’re bold enough to get a gun and learn how to shoot it.


by Duane Birth